No Really It's Not All About You

Yesterday I started another work week.... It was an interesting day. I was getting my head back into the whole thought of work and bracing myself for another 12 hour day. A few hours into my shift I get a text from a good friend of mine telling me that her daughter had been attacked by a dog the day before and was in hospital. Of course I was concerned. Above all else I felt helpless since there was nothing I could do. And I HATE that feeling. I was at work so I couldn't get the full story but this person said that they would be on IM after I was done work.

Fast forward to the end of work. SS was supposed to pick up a few things for me during the day. Somehow that turned out to be an epic fail. So in the end he wound up going out to Sobey's to pick up a couple of things (good deal if you buy 2 Old El Paso products you can get free ground beef.... couldn't pass that up) and then dropping it off. Suddenly I got cornered. He starts asking if we're okay (what are we a couple here???) and then commenting on how we never hang out together. Dude I am working 55 hours a week here. When I get home from work I have very little time before bed. And on my days off I pretty much just want to hide. My apartment is pretty cold (but I'll leave details on that for another post) and I just want to relax with Azrael. I don't generally want to be social... Now during the afternoon then I don't mind seeing people... but by evening I just want to be alone. So maybe if he was off during the day I might be up for it... maybe... not making any promises.

No matter how many times though I said that I am not talking to anyone.... and have become pretty reclusive he wouldn't let it go. Just kept bitching about not spending any time together over and over.... Number 1... I don't see him actually suggesting any plans. He just tells me to call if I want to do something. Guess what... I don't want to do anything. Secondly, when plans are going to involve my place and watching a movie I can do that alone and it will be much more relaxing. Lastly, it just seemed like a really selfish and manipulative train of thought. I seriously wanted to tell him to make some more friends so that he will have someone else to spend time with.

How about taking on my perspective? Right now I am in week 5 of the extended hours. It takes quite a toll on you. I understand and can appreciate asking if there is a problem in the relationship (although it still sounded too much like something you would ask a partner and not a friend) but you don't need the manipulation to try and force me to agree to plans. Maybe I am being selfish by depriving someone of the opportunity to spend time with me. But I really don't want to spend extended time with someone that takes a lot out of me... and I really use my time off to recover and prepare myself for the next work week. I am sorry if that impacts your social life but it's about my own survival here and making it through.

Evicting the Tenants from the Roach Motel

A while back I realized that I had some visitors at home.... in the form of cockroaches. I think I avoided blogging about it because I didn't want to admit there was a problem and I didn't want people to tell me I was going to need to call the professionals and then be finding somewhere for me and Azrael (who is currently stoned and passed out on the floor I might add... the wonders of catnip) to stay for a few days.

So SS came over and we moved everything out of the kitchen and let loose with the Raid. Sounded like a fantastic idea at the time. There was a problem with that thought though. All it takes is one to be left alive and with eggs and you're screwed. And those things are resilient. So part of the problem is that we moved everything out and there were roaches living in some of those boxes so we just put them back. As I discovered later they were also in the microwave. In the end we just reduced the number but didn't eliminate the problem.

After spending money and time recaulking as many cracks as we could find and can after can of Raid I was basically just cohabitating with the damn things. And I'm going out on a limb and saying that inhaling all those chemicals is not good for me or for Azrael. I will also say that the selection of pest control products in this town is horrible.... Online I found all kinds of other solutions but nothing locally.

Eventually you just get to a point where it's time to deal with it... It's simliar to when I had the ingrown toe nail and one morning I woke up and knew that it was time to go to the hospital and have them deal with it. I just knew it was time and if it meant leaving for a few days so be it. Now I should point out right about now that a few months ag (that's how long I had been dealing with it) the maintenance guy saw the traps and asked if I wanted them to deal with it. I said no and specifically said that it was because I didn't want to be staying elsewhere for a couple of days. Skip ahead and I just want them gone.... whatever it takes. So I call Orkin and come to find out that they don't spray and I wouldn't need to leave my home at all. Could I not have been told that a few months ago? So as soon as I found that out I told them to come in as soon as possible. In case anyone is wondering they use a gel treatment. It takes about a week for it to be working and I can definitely see the effect it is having. I love the thought at evicting those little bastards from the apartment. Well I suppose I am not really evicting them since they're dead but any ways. I want it to be me and Azrael.... not me, Azrael, and a host of other critters.